WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!! Storm 2008, live!

12:35pm the phone rings, it's my mom's cell phone. Pause. OK, I'll answer.
Garble, garble.
MOM, I can't hear you!
DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING?!
(Crap, Grandma died.)
What, mom?
Garble, garble... tornado...garble...do you have a basement? Get in the downstairs closet!
What?!
Here, listen...(she holds her phone up to the radio, where I hear a radio newsguy screaming that a tornado is hitting our neighborhood at 12:40pm.)
(Hmmm, that's in five minutes. Glad I answered the phone.) Thank you, mom, goodbye!
Where is the dang remote!!! I need to turn it to the news!!!
I call the school to make sure our kids have been sufficiently terrorized. They have, they are under their desks with the blinds drawn. The high schooler calls to say they are evacuating to the gym. Thank you, school.
I have the kids cram into the powder room with me. I have couch cushions and blankets over our heads. Meanwhile, Chris the Brave stays behind to find the remote. He eventually finds it under the unfolded laundry.
By this time #3 (our oak) is in hysterics. Mom, why does Jesus make storms, Mom?!?! Superturd is mimicking her. The baby doesn't want to be trapped in the bathroom (it's been 3 minutes, this is not good).
Luckily Chris had found the news, which told us that the danger had passed and we weren't as near death as once thought. In fact, it might not have been a tornado after all. Maybe just a thunder storm. Natalie on the news points out that it was A really loud thunder storm and you can never be too careful with those, you know. Are you kidding me?
My only real regret in all of this... not being on hand at the grade school when #2 was under her desk awaiting impending doom. I'm sure it was quite a show. Come to think of it, I might need to call the school and make sure they have gotten her calmed down now. I cant' wait to pick them up and hear all about the excitement.