I Feel So Honored to be Trusted Again, Even if it's Only Because We're Broke

This is the only before picture I have of Chris' hair. It was so long that it hung down over his ears and his side burns stuck out like two fluffy pork chops on the side of his head. He just broken our kitchen chair and was lying on the floor moaning, so I got a picture to remember the moment.

The last time I cut Chris' hair was when we still lived in the duplex/bird house. That was in 2000. I'm not sure how long I was even allowed to cut his hair. I totally remember WHY I was allowed to cut his hair.

He had told me about his haircutter's night job. She was his friend's girlfriend and she cut his hair in their home. One day he came home telling me about her recent purchase of enhancements to increase her income at her night job. How the $8000 she had spent would be well worth it since they would pay for themselves in tips. Ok. Not sure what he's thinking at this point.

The turning point was when we dropped by his friend's work to say hi. He asked me if Chris had told me about the recent purchase. He had. He asked me if Chris told me how real they looked and told me how big Chris' eyes had gotten when she showed him. REALLY showed him. ALL THE WAY. Chris' gave him the DUDE, SHUT UP look and I got the HE DID WHAT? look. The guy apologized to Chris real quick for getting him in trouble. We didn't speak to each other for days. It never came up. Ever. We went to Costco and got the hair clipper package complete with instructional video. We didn't discuss it, we just threw it in the cart. That's when I started cutting his hair.

I did an ok job until this one time, the night before an interview for a management position. I was cutting and had a little accident in the back. Not a bad one. Just a little zigzag Charlie Brown thing. I felt it was best not to tell him since it would only make him self conscience at his interview. The day he finally noticed the problem was the same day I stopped cutting his hair.

Last night he let me try again on the condition that he would be returning to his barber if I messed up. I even showed him my non-enhancements while I cut it. I didn't really, but I'd like to pretend I did.

There should never be this much hair after any man's hair cut.

Here's the final product, I'm pretty amazing.