Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Chris' top ten, slightly edited for the PG rating

1.You outa know-Alanis Morressette
Pure hatred and you know that she won't rest until she ends her ex's new relationship. I am sure that guy comes home from work with a smile on his face one day until he walks into the kitchen to see Alanis and his new girlfriend sitting at the table drinking coffee. Alanis is smiling and the new girlfriend is not.

2.LaBamba-Richie Valens
I picked this one because once dumped I always fantasized about moving to Mexico where I would be seen as an American Millionaire with my $1500 savings account where I could have many really hot Mexican girlfriends.

3.Loveshack-B52's
Whenever I was dumped ( I am not sure I ever dumped anybody, it was always me getting dumped) I considered becoming gay since gays always seem so happy on TV.

4.Anything from Pantera-Pantera
I am an angry victim. Angry music makes me happy and reminds me that she is a dirty b-word.

5.I guess that is why they call it the blues-Elton John
Again, thinking of becoming gay. If not gay than I would listen to this song in my underwear eating jello and crying into the night wishing I was dead. After thinking of that scenario I am starting to wish I was dead again.

6.Who let the dogs out-I don't know who 'sang' this
Shiny penny.

7.Take on me-Aha
When I got dumped I sometimes wished I was a really cool cartoonish British guy with great hair.

8.Monster Power Ballads-Various artists
Sadly, this came out well after I got married so I haven't had the pleasure of using it as break up music.

9.When I'm with you-Sherriff
While not a breakup song, or an angry song, I am always amazed on how long he can hold that note at the end. This distracts me and makes me forget the lying, cheating, whore.

10.Anything from Pearl Jam-Pearl Jam
I am again distracted by the fact that I can't understand one word of what Eddie Veder sings....not one word. And for this I am thankful.


Thank you,

Chris

2 comments:

jlcumber said...

too freaking funny!

Sam said...

I think I peed a little bit while reading. 'Scuze me. :)