Mmmm, Cheat Day

MoMo needed me to cut up her Saturday morning cinnamon roll for her, which I did, and I took a bite. She asked me why I always do that. Why I always take a bite of her food when I cut it. I followed the ancient tradition of great mothers and told her that I just wanted to make sure it wasn't poison. She said if it was poison then I would have died, so why would I do that? I told her that, of course, if one of us was going to die I'd rather it be me. This was a mistake. See, what happens is, I forget that MoMo is the most sensitive, emotional, high strung child ever to walk this beautiful earth. Her level of sensitivity is like if you took all the rest of our family's feelings and combined them. If we had just lost a loved one. And we were PMSing. And we needed medication.

Having neglected to take this in to consideration, I made MoMo cry. She said that if I died from her food then she would eat it too, so that we would die of the poison food together. Now I had to do my constant damage control, telling her that the food isn't poison. It will never be poison. I'm just teasing and I really just wanted a bite and mommy's a liar and she sucks.

Now, where is that one pound bag of M&Ms when I need them?